Wedding RSVP guide for couples and guests

Choose a date that gives your family, venue and caterer time to act. Put the deadline in the invitation and the WhatsApp message so guests see the same instruction in both places.

Work backwards from the decision that depends on the number. If seating, catering or transport needs confirmation, ask the venue or caterer when they need the final count, then leave time for a reminder and a final check.

A deadline is easier to follow when it is specific: write the day, date and time zone rather than saying 'as soon as possible'. If you extend the deadline, update the invitation and send a short message so guests do not rely on an outdated instruction.

Name, attendance status and pax are usually enough. Enable notes only when you have a clear reason, such as access information or an important dietary note.

The database accepts a maximum of 50 pax per RSVP. Set an invitation rule that reflects the actual event rather than using the maximum by default. If a guest needs to request a larger household allocation, handle that separately so the public form remains easy to complete.

Explain what pax means in plain language. 'How many people will attend with you?' is clearer for guests than a label that assumes they know event-planning terminology.

Use the Kadlah customer portal to review recent responses, separate confirmed guests from non-attendees, and follow up before you share a final number with your vendors.

Review responses by household or invitation context, not only by a total number. Look for duplicate submissions, a changed answer or a note that needs a personal reply. Keep a simple record of the number sent to the caterer and the date it was confirmed.

Do not treat a missing RSVP as a confirmed attendee. A polite reminder with the original link is usually more useful than guessing, especially when a family group may have assumed that someone else would respond.

Send one reminder before the deadline and a final message only when you need to close the count. Keep the tone warm and make the requested action obvious: open the link, choose attending or not attending, and enter the household pax if required.

For older relatives or guests who do not regularly use web forms, offer help without asking them to share sensitive information in a group chat. A family member can assist while the response is still recorded against the correct invitation.

Keep the reminder separate from other family announcements so the RSVP request does not get buried. A useful message names the couple, repeats the deadline and gives one action. It does not need to explain the entire wedding plan again.

If a guest says they are unsure, record that uncertainty in your planning notes rather than changing a confirmed answer without their permission. Ask for a final response by the deadline and treat the published RSVP record as the source for the count.

After the deadline, separate confirmed guests, declined invitations and people who have not answered. Share only the information vendors need, and avoid forwarding a full guest list when a total count is enough.

If the event changes after the list is sent, update the published invitation and contact affected guests directly. RSVP is a planning aid, not a replacement for communicating an important change.

When sharing totals with vendors, provide the number they need and the date it was calculated. Avoid forwarding names, phone numbers or notes unless the recipient genuinely needs them for the event.

After the event, keep only the records you need for your account and operational purposes. Do not reuse a guest list for a different event without a clear reason and appropriate consent.

Before the deadline, decide whether a response marked as unsure needs a personal follow-up and who will make that call. A simple policy prevents several family members from contacting the same guest with different instructions.

Do not change a guest's response on their behalf just to make the total look complete. If someone replies in a message instead of the form, ask them to submit the RSVP or record the information carefully and tell them what was recorded.

When pax is enabled, clarify whether children, drivers or helpers count. The invitation should describe the rule in everyday language so a guest does not have to guess how the number will be used.

Send the caterer or venue the total they need, the date it was calculated and any agreed assumptions. A total is often enough; forwarding every guest name, phone number or note increases the chance of unnecessary personal-data sharing.

Keep a note of the final count and any later change. If a vendor needs a revised number, send a new total with its timestamp instead of asking them to compare several screenshots of RSVP responses.

A family group may receive one link while a couple may each receive a personal message. State whether the response should represent one person, a couple or the whole household, and explain the allowed pax when it is not obvious.

If different functions have different guest lists, do not use one generic RSVP question for all of them. A guest should know which ceremony or reception their response applies to before they submit it.

When the RSVP deadline passes, save the date and total you used for catering or seating. Mark late changes separately so a new response does not silently replace the number that has already been sent to a vendor.

If you keep a planning spreadsheet, store only the minimum information needed for the event and protect it from being forwarded with a public invitation. The Kadlah portal remains the source for responses submitted through the invitation.

After the celebration, review whether you still need the planning copy. Keeping fewer copies of guest information reduces accidental sharing while leaving the account records needed for normal service operations.